


Just this once (let me have it again)

by TheLozerTrashCan



Category: A3! (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Feels, Gen, He said like one word then the rest are dialogues, Implied/Referenced Child Neglect, Takes place before joining and discovering Mankai
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-09
Updated: 2020-09-09
Packaged: 2021-03-07 02:14:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 869
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26359303
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheLozerTrashCan/pseuds/TheLozerTrashCan
Summary: For a man who can easily have it all, loneliness is one of it.(A birthday fic from Banri)
Comments: 8
Kudos: 21





	Just this once (let me have it again)

A lit of a flame from a candle slowly brighten the dark room.

"There we go." Banri murmured and took a seat.

He faced the table where his source of light came from. There lies a small cupcake, its chocolate flavoured with blue icing and candies in it along a single brown and white stripes candle placed on top. 

For such a long table, the only food placed there is a single cupcake for his birthday.

It's sad to look at to be honest. His classmates keep telling him that his birthday are the one he must look forward. It'll be full of guest, food, party games and gifts just to enjoy the day he was born. It's also always the talk when someone finished theirs. They brag about how their house is full of guest along the buffet tables, how one of the gifts they got is a latest brand of shoes and more toys to fill up their collection and how person A did something stupid that became one of the most memorable of the party.

How that day is really one of the most beautiful and memorable day to look forward to.

And after the bragging, they'll turn their way to him and ask about what did he did when it comes to his birthday. Knowing he's the top one in their class that never change nor waver as time passed, his birthday celebration must be an extravaganza one from all of his hard work.

Well believe it or not, it's not that great of a story to brag about.

So Banri lies about his, it's the one lie he'll drag to his grave.

At such a young age, Banri learned the true meaning of birthday.

It's just like every other day. There's no gifts for him to open, no guest to swarm their house, no buffet to take over every table available, party games to bring laugh and joy to everyone. There's no laughter and singing of a birthday song to fill up the dead silence and no joy to lighten up the gloomy mood.

Birthday is just like every other day. A day that passed by just like every other day despite having a special event written there just for him. An event that's like a fleeting moment that come and go from his life. A event that he never give care nor took interest in it.

Yet here he is, was about to blow a candle from his 'cake'.

Banri didn't know why he did this. He's not jealous. Yes he may be at that age where childish jealousy exist but no, he's really not jealous-

_(He didn't wanna talk the happiness that brighten up his classmates face when they talk about their birthday party. He didn't wanna talk about his sudden reminiscing where he used to have those when birthday celebration where a thing to his household. He didn't wanna talk about the slowly crave of wanting to feel that kind of emotion again after never getting a lick of it. He didn't wanna talk about how that thought alone haunts him on his way home. He didn't want to talk about that he stop at the front the middle of the sidewalk when he remembered that today is actually his birthday. He didn't wanna talk about that he went to the bakery and spend his last remaining allowance to buy a single cupcake to celebrate his 'birthday' just to see what the hype of celebrating 'birthday' is all about and not because he also want to feel the sense of joy and pride again, no not one bit)_

-really, he's not jealous.

Banri frowned as he watched the fire flick from left to right, not knowing what to do. 

Now that he got a 'cake' as his birthday 'present', what is the next step again to this again? 

Oh right, singing.

So with that, he slowly sang a birthday song to himself in the room. The thunder that thud loudly outside along the loud drops of raindrops sang along.

He continued, until a roar of thunder stop his soft whisper of the song and brings him back to reality.

He didn't jump at the sound, no, but he did wipe something to his eyes that is definitely not tears. It's becoming blurry, that's all.

He took a deep breath and thought again. What was next then?

His blue eyes suddenly flicked to the candle. He guess this is the next step.

_(Just to end this sad, lonely event and call it a day)_

He took a deep breath again. Eyes squinted but not closing, not yet. His mind is screaming at him to make a wish but he won't do that, knowing it'll never came true like his other past wishes.

And with that, Banri closed his eyes and finally blow the candle, bringing the room back to the darkness, along his life.

_(-but from the deeper back of his mind, he chant his wish again. To feel the love and attention of his parents again and the adrenaline that can make him want to do more than he ever expect)_

_(And after years had passed, his wish finally came true)_

**Author's Note:**

> My first work on this fandom so I really hope I did okay,,,
> 
> This fic is based on a prompt which is [this tweet](https:%22//twitter.com/miracleboi_/status/1302613094502264833?s=19%22). Though, it's supposed to be a ship one but I noticed it late so I just let it be XD
> 
> Criticisms, Kudos and Comments are welcome and appreciated! Also, come scream and watch me cry over Citron at [twitter](https://mobile.twitter.com/rawr_im_trashy) I guess XD


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